


The Mighty Book of Kinks

by teddybagwell



Category: The Mighty Boosh (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Dom/sub, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Gay Sex, Kinks, M/M, Oral Sex, Pain Kink, Pure Smut, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Smut, biting kink, its a mighty book of smut, like literally - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-02-25 22:20:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18710821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teddybagwell/pseuds/teddybagwell
Summary: Vince has many kinks and introduces them to Howard.





	1. Sub/Dom

**Author's Note:**

> I think this is literally going to be just a fic of different kinks that Vince has and introduces to Howard because it's what we all deserve. I'm back on my bullshit and writing hardcore smut. Comments are always lovely to read, I hope you all enjoy! <3

Both men sat beside each other in their double bed. One, sat straight with their back pressed against the headboard and a thick book placed in their lap. The other lay with their head against the pillow, a magazine in their hands and their legs bent in an arch with one crossed over the other.

‘Howard?’

‘Mm.’ 

‘I’m bored,’ Vince sighed, dropping the latest NME beside the bed. He’d been flipping through the pages aimlessly for ten minutes. 

‘You’re always bored,’ Howard spoke monotonously, not even bothering to look up from his Big Book of Jazz he'd got from the library. Despite adoring the man beside him, he was too gripped to have the ability to look away. 

‘We’ve been sat ‘ere for an hour, I’ve read that magazine twice!’ Vince exclaimed, twirling strands of hair between his fingers. 

‘Then do something else.’ 

Vince huffed, looking around the room. It was silent, almost too silent. He could take a shower, but he didn’t want to, not yet. He could ring Leroy to see about going out but he didn’t fancy the crowds and the music, which was a change of pace for Vince. He just wanted Howard. And his attention. 

‘What’s the book about?’ Vince asked, finally looking over at Howard to see he was still sat exactly like he was an hour ago. He wondered if his legs were cramping from being sat so still for so long. 

‘What do you want, Vince?’ Howard said, getting a little more annoyed every time Vince attempted conversation. 

‘I wanna talk, I wanna ‘ave a conversation, not just sit in silence,’ Vince stressed, sitting up and turning to the man beside him. 

‘What do you want to talk about?’ 

Vince frowned, grabbing the book from Howard's grip, watching the panic rise in his face as he did so. 'Before y'start cryin', it's bookmarked, now pay attention to me.' Vince dropped the book beside the bed, noticing Howard flinch. 'Remember back at the zoo when we used to stay up all night talkin'? I miss that.'

'We can still do that, little man,' Howard said, letting his hand rest on Vince's thigh. ‘I’d have been much happier to talk if I’d been given the chance to finish that chapter but okay, let’s talk. What do you want to start with, the meaning of life, the sanctity of-‘

'Y'got any weird kinks?' Vince grinned, blue eyes gleaming with interest.

'W-what?' Howard spluttered, his cheeks turning rosy red. 

Vince adored the fact that they'd been together for months, Howard had bummed him silly more times than he could count, and Vince had demanded Howard say the filthiest of things to him, and yet Howard still became flustered at even the notion of sex in conversation.

'Y'know, are y'into anythin' weird?' Vince pressed, watching Howard blink rapidly. 'C'mon, Howard, I've heard how filthy y'get when y'bum me, don't act all innocent.' 

'I'm a man of simple desires, Vincey-'

'What is it, feet?' Vince grinned, Howard's face scrunched up. 'Everyone has a kink, s'nothin' to be ashamed about!'

'Oh, really? Come on then, what's yours?' Howard folded his arms across his chest, a small smile playing on his lips. 

'I've got a couple,' he replied, a grin forming on his pink lips. ‘You tell me yours and I’ll tell y’mine.’

Howard sighed, he really didn’t have an answer. He hadn’t had any other sexual experiences other than with Vince so his fantasies had always been someone merely wanting to be intimate with him in that way. On the other hand, he desperately wanted to hear about Vince’s own fantasies. 

‘I know y’haven’t had much experience,’ Vince started, almost reading his mind. ‘But that can’t mean y’haven’t thought about it.’ 

‘I don’t know, Vince, anyone wanting to have sex with me was a fantasy!’ Howard blushed deeply, and Vince took pity. 

‘Y’wanna know what mine are then?’ he asked, letting the tips of his fingers dance up and down Howard’s chest. ‘Y’never know y’might take a shine to ‘em.’

‘W-what are they?’ 

‘I like bein’ submissive, I like someone doin’ whatever they want with me and treatin’ me like property. Would y’like that, havin’ your way with me, maybe tyin’ me up and teasin’ me until I’m screamin’ y'name?’ Vince’s eyes lit with fire behind them, and Howard was sure he looked the same. 

The thought of Vince naked and tied up for him drifted into his mind; his eyes heavy and his cock leaking, wanting any form of attention it could get. Howard almost drooled at the thought. 

‘I’d- I’d like that,’ Howard muttered.

‘Yeah? How about we ‘ave a little go now?’ Vince smirked, instantly moving to straddle Howard. 

****

Vince held two ties in his hand, the only objects he could find that would be good enough to restrain him. He knew he wasn’t wrong when he said ties were multipurpose. 

Howard fell on top of Vince, already feeling the eager man’s hands on the end of his shirt. 

‘Excited?’ Howard joked before beginning to leave hot kisses up and down Vince’s neck.

‘I’ve thought about this for god knows 'ow many years,’ Vince breathed, running his fingers through Howard’s fine hair as his lips worked on his neck. 

‘You’ve never lived out any of your fantasies?’ Howard asked, pulling Vince’s shirt up and over his head before discarding it on the floor. 

A chuckle escaped those soft, plump lips. ‘When y’hear some of ‘em you’ll get why.’

Ominous, Howard thought.

‘Talk t’me, Howard,’ Vince whispered, running his hands up and down his sides, sending shivers from head to toe.

Howard wasn’t new to dirty talk. Since their relationship started up, Howard had learned that Vince got off on it, he liked when Howard was vocal and spoke to him in a way Howard would never have imagined he’d speak to any human being. However, he now had to have dominance over the other man and he was clueless on how to go about it. 

‘Tell me what y’gonna do t’me, tell me I’m yours, Howard. Be aggressive with me,' Vince panted, rocking his hips up so that they brushed against Howard's ever so gently. 

'I-I want to make you feel good, I want to make you, make you... come,' Howard stuttered, keeping an eye on Vince to make sure he wasn't making a fool of himself, but all he could see was pure lust and anticipation.

'And I can't come until y'tell me, yeah?' Vince hinted, having had this idea in his mind for so long, he knew exactly what he wanted. 

'And you can't come until I tell you to, and if you do,' Howard took a deep breath; feeling like the air was running away from him. 'If you do, you get punished.'

'Oh, fuck. Howard, please,' Vince whimpered, unbuttoning his skinny jeans and dragging them down and throwing them across the room. 'Get them trousers off.'

'Uh, who's in charge here?' he asked, grabbing the ties along with Vince's wrist, pulling it up to the bedpost. 

'Y-you are, Howard,' Vince breathed heavily, his hard-on pressing painfully against his boxers. His eyes followed Howard's hands as they restrained him, his heart thumped wildly in his chest. 

Howard tied the material insanely tight causing the smaller man to bite down on his bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood. His head spun as the same was done to his other wrist.

'How's that feel?' Howard asked, watching for any discomfort. 

'Tight, but good,' Vince sighed, already feeling his shoulders begin to ache, but it somehow only added to the arousal dripping through his body.

Vince licked his lips as Howard stood to remove his trousers. He couldn't believe it was happening, all the times he'd played this out in his head when he was wanking off and it was finally happening. With Howard. 

The man above him rubbed him through his boxers, causing his body to jolt automatically. Before he could comprehend, his boxers were soaring over Howard's shoulder, followed by a second pair.

'I've got to say, you do you look wonderful like this,' the man breathed, drinking in the sight; all of his power and control stripped away and granted to Howard with a pretty bow tied around it. It aroused him more than he'd imagined, seeing Vince so helpless.

Vince yanked at the restraint as though wanting to be free, however, the fire in his eyes said something different; the aching in his wrists and the uncomfortable position he was forced into struck a much deeper, darker part of his psyche.

Howard grabbed the lube out of the drawer beside the bed, catching Vince's eyes beaming with anticipation, his slick tongue running across his bottom lip. A shiver ran down Vince's neck as a lubed up hand closed around his cock and started stroking him slowly. 

'Oh, Howard,' Vince whimpered, arching his back in response. 'Fuck me.'

Howard relished in the fact Vince wanted him, needed him, needed his touch. He was always so calm and collected, but now, beneath Howard, he was feeble.

'I think you're forgetting who's in charge tonight, little man,' Howard rasped, speeding up his jerking motion. 

'Howard, p-please, I'm gonna-' 

His fantasy becoming reality was too much; Vince could already feel the familiar warmth in his stomach, he was reaching the edge.

'You're not going to come, are you, Vincey?' Howard questioned, but before he could even finish, Vince's orgasm was wracking through his body at the sound of Howard's tone. 

'Oh-oh, Howard, m'sorry, s-sorry,' Vince whimpered, his climax washing over him. His head hit the headboard as he devoured all the pleasure Howard was giving him. White spurts dripped down Howard's knuckles as he stroked the man through the pleasure. 

Howard tutted, 'I really thought you were going to be good for me, Vince.'

'M'sorry, Howard,' the man replied, his breathing slowly steadying. 

'Clean my hand,' Howard said, bring his come-covered fist to Vince's soft pink lips. 

Vince didn't hesitate to drag his tongue across Howard's knuckles and taste his own come. His eyes never left Howard as his tongue brushed his skin, and Howard had to stop himself from letting out a moan.

'Guess what happens now?' Howard whispered, pressing kisses across the sharp collarbone. 

'I-I don't know,' Vince said, gasping when teeth sank into his skin.

'I'm going to fuck you,' Howard rasped, feeling Vince roll his hips forward in response. 'And since you've already come...' 

A hand came into contact with Vince's thigh, the harsh sound of skin hitting skin falling into the air and mixing with Vince's surprised moan. 

'You probably won't want to come again, will you?' Howard taunted, stroking the spot he'd just slapped, feeling his thighs tighten around his waist.

'I do, Howard, please,' he whispered, despite having climaxed less than a minute ago, his skin was on fire with desire. 

'You're not going to, not this time, understand?' the man warned. Vince got off on being told when he could and couldn't come, and Howard knew it all too well. 

'O-okay.'

Howard grabbed for the lube once again, pouring a generous amount onto his fingers. His cock ached for release, he was sure he couldn't wait any longer.

Vince became a whimpering mess as the first finger protruded his hole, Howard observed him closely as he pushed further and further. 

'That feeling okay?' he asked, stopping momentarily.

'Y-yeah, keep goin',' he uttered, eyes clenched tightly. 

More lube and two fingers later, Howard was satisfied that he was ready; he knew because the grunts of discomfort had faded into soft mewls of pleasure. 

'Ready?' Howard asked, positioning himself at Vince's entrance. Vince nodded wildly, throwing his head back, merely waiting. 

It was almost too much. The feeling of Vince around his cock was one that he would never grow tired of, especially when it was mixed with his low moans.

'You feel so good,' he whispered, pulling out only to thrust back in without hesitation. 

'Only for- for you,' the smaller man whispered, tugging at the ties around his wrists. 'I wanna touch you-'

'Uh-uh, no. You're staying like this until I come.' 

Vince could feel his head spinning, he was sure there was sweat running down the side of his face. His cock ached; the sensation of Howard's length brushing against his prostate proving too much for him.

Howard wasn't a significantly vocal lover when, he wasn't one to make a show of it like Vince tended to, but even the gentle grunts and groans leaving his lips were enough to drive Vince to the edge. 

Fingers dug into his slender hips, lips attacked his neck, he was pounded relentlessly while all he could do was lay there and take it, and feel the pleasure course through his body. 

'Fuck,' the taller man whispered, feeling his rhythm speed up as he chased his orgasm. 'I'm close.'

'C-can I, Howard, can I come?' Vince pleaded, his eyes boring into Howard's. 

'No.'

'Howard, Howard, please, I'm- I can't, I can't, I'm gonna-'

Howard stopped. Vince whined, throwing his head back, the need to let go was too great, enveloping him completely. He needed release.

'You're not going to come again, are you? You're not that greedy, surely,' Howard asked, moving his hips only slightly as not to hit the spot Vince needed to let go.

'N-no, I wanna please y'Howard, I'm- I'm not gonna come.' Vince was a sweating, panting mess and the sight was what Howard needed to reach his own orgasm. 

Thrusting deeply into Vince's tight hole, Howard didn't have time prepare as he came deep inside of him, never halting his hips as he rode through the hot white pleasure. 

'Fuck,' he whispered, pulling out of Vince to see his own come leaking onto the bedsheets. 'That was amazing.'

Vince remained quiet. Howard looked up to see him chewing on his bottom lip, his cock standing tall with precum collecting at the tip before flowing down the length, all while still being tied to the bedposts. Howard sympathised.

'Do you wanna come?' he asked the man beneath him, stroking his hips with his thumbs. 

'Mhm, but m'not gonna,' Vince whispered, his hands balled into fists. 

'Not even if I say you can?' Howard raised an eyebrow, a smile playing on his lips.

'Howard, please,' Vince pleaded for what felt like the millionth time that night. 

'If I untie you, are you going to wank yourself off for me, let me watch you come all over yourself?'

Vince bit back a moan at the filth leaving Howard's lips, nodding his head. He sighed once the restraints were loosened, he wasted no time and wrapped his fingers around his cock, using his own precum as lube. 

'Oh, Howard,' he murmured, pumping his cock erratically as he chased the orgasm that had slipped away from him. 

Howard studied him as he got himself off; the way his mouth fell open, the way he leaned back on his arm and watched his own hand wanking his cock, those eyes flicking up every now and then to see if Howard was still watching. 

'C-can I come? Please.'

'Since you asked so nicely. Come for me.' 

It was all Vince needed to feel that familiar sensation swirling through his lower body for the second time that night. The sensitivity only somehow adding to the pleasure. His come dripped down his fist and coated his stomach, and Howard thought it was the most beautiful thing he'd ever been fortunate enough to witness.

'You were definitely into that,' Vince grinned, pushing the hair out of his face as he tried to catch his breath.


	2. Pain Kink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I planned to have this finished and posted before I went to manchester but I procrastinated too much so it's three days later than planned. Nevertheless, I hope you all enjoy it! <3

'A pain kink?' Howard repeated. 'You're the last person I would've guessed to be into that sort of thing, you're so far up your own arse I'd have thought you'd be into being worshipped.' 

'How d'y'know that isn't another one of my kinks?' he asked, smirking stupidly. Vince certainly wouldn't turn down being praised and worshipped repeatedly, especially whilst getting off; it sounded heavenly. 

'It wouldn't be the most shocking discovery, would it?' Howard remarked, knowing all too well how much Vince loved himself. ‘So… pain kink.'

'Hm. I wanna be slapped around a bit, y'know?' Vince chewed his bottom lip, smothering a grin. 

'And that gets you off?' Howard asked, lacing their fingers together while Vince watched as they laid in bed, their naked bodies closer than necessary. 

‘The thought of it, yeah. I've never actually told anyone 'cause I didn't want 'em to think I was mental. I've been spanked before and I loved that, but I want more,' he said, watching Howard closely for any signs of discomfort.

Howard willed himself not to think about Vince with anyone else; it only left him feeling an array of negative emotions and eventually led him to subconsciously taking it out on Vince with his short temper. 

'Like what?'

*

‘Vince, I’m not sure about this..’ Howard held the knife in his hand, wondering suddenly how he’d managed to land himself into the current situation. ‘This can't be safe.’

’S’what makes it fun!’ Vince smirked, resting on his elbows as he noticed the worry spread across Howard’s face like a sudden storm. ‘Look, we don’t ‘ave to do it if y’don’t want to.'

‘I want to, if this is what you like, I'm willing to give it a go. It's just, what if I accidentally... hurt you?' 

Vince rolled his eyes. 'S'the whole point, Howard. I'm not askin' y'to actually impale me, awright? I'm not that kinky. Just relax.' 

Howard failed to see how he could possibly relax when he was completely naked and holding a knife in his sweaty palm.

'All it takes is one wrong move and you've got a knife in your stomach.'

'I love it when y'talk filthy like that,' Vince remarked, a small grin forming on his lips. 

'Knife safety is no joke, little man.' 

Vince kissed him to shut him up, his tongue slipping between chapped lips and exploring freely. Fingers gripped the ends of Howard's hair, his head spun. He could almost forget about the weapon in his grip if he tried hard enough. 

'I want you, Howard,' Vince mumbled against his lips, his tongue dragging across the bottom lip, sending him into a frenzy. 

'Can't disappoint then, can I?' Howard whispered, reluctantly pulling away from the comfort of his soft, plump lips. He realised he was holding the knife away from both of them with his arm stretched out, he placed it beside them on the bed before grabbing the bottle of lube. 

Vince gasped delicately when Howard wrapped his fist around his cock, he rotated his hips in circles, thrusting up to hold onto the pleasure seeping through his veins. 

'Oh, Howard,' he whispered, throwing his head back against the pillow. 'Feels so good.'

'Yeah?' Howard wanted nothing more than to speed up and watch Vince fall apart in his hands but decided to savour it instead; besides, teasing Vince and watching him gradually become more aroused and frustrated satisfied him just as well.

'Y-yeah, don't stop. Please.' 

The knife felt taboo in his hand as he twirled it. Vince's skin was too pure, he thought. The soft, smooth feel was something Howard absolutely adored and to damage it seemed sinful. 

However, what his precious Vince wants, his precious Vince gets. 

He started by lightly trailing the tip of the knife across his chest, coming dangerously close to his right nipple before trailing down to his stomach. The man below him gasped with every touch, arching his back wonderfully. In a fleeting moment of bravery, Howard added pressure, his heart racing wildly as he broke the delicate skin. Vince's head lulled back, his hair splayed across the pillow.

'Oh my god, Howard, yes,' he groaned as a new sensation erupted in his body; a concoction of pain and pleasure. Looking down at his stomach he saw several beads of blood forming in a thin red line. 'Fuck, that's well hot.'

Howard never stopped pumping Vince's leaking cock, his rhythm disrupted only when he felt his attention needed to be on the knife, for Vince's safety and his own sanity. 

He was constantly swallowing guilt that bubbled in his stomach and threatened to spill out of his mouth, especially whenever Vince hissed and his eyes clenched shut. He felt he was doing something wrong but all he ever desired was to make Vince feel good, even if it meant causing him pain to do so. 

'You okay, little man?' he asked when Vince lay still, his eyes close tightly. Howard stroked his bare thigh lovingly.

'More than,' he replied with a shaking breath, heavy eyes opening to relieve thick, large pupils. Howard resumed his stroking, giving the man a break from the harsh blade by lightly dragging the knife so it probably tickled him instead. 'Y'makin' me feel so good.'

Howard didn't give himself time to think before he leaned down and dragged his warm tongue across one of the fresh wounds on Vince's stomach, the sharp metallic tang invading his tastebuds as his tongue burned and his head spun.

'Holy shit,' Vince gasped, the display Howard put on of tasting his blood mixed with the sheer magic Howard was doing with his hand proving too much for him. 'H-Howard, I'm gonna- fuck!' 

Vince's cum spilt over Howard's fist and sputtered on his chest while he rolled his hips, adoring the tight grip Howard had on his cock. Howard fell in love with the way the man's body trembled as the pleasure rocked through him.

Howard continued milking Vince cock even as his orgasm died down, causing Vince to whimper and attempt, and fail, to free himself from the stronghold. He watched the man beneath him closely, watching for the winces and the frown, listening for that melodic whimper and the breathing gradually getting heavier as the sensitivity became too much, as it became painful.

'H-Howard, I can't- too, too sensitive,' Vince stuttered, the pleasurable feeling mix with a burn he'd never experienced before. ‘Oh my god.’

'Isn't this what you wanted? You wanted pain, didn't you?' Howard teased, brushing his thumb over the tip of his half-hard cock.

'Mhm,' he hummed so quietly it was almost nonexistent, his body never stilling. 'It-it hurts-'

Vince was torn; the pleasure was promptly turning into pain, numbing his entire body, and yet, he could feel the arousal spreading through his body at the power Howard was demonstrating. The lube mixed with his own come provided some comfort for his sensitive cock, but Howard’s calloused palm felt as though it was burning through the skin.

Vince kept his eyes shut; his vision blurry whenever he dared to open them. Howard took pity. sensing that he was way past being overstimulated, and finally ended the torture. 

'Are you feelin' alright?' Howard asked, concern laced in his voice. He caressed Vince's flushed cheek, stroking it softly with the pad of his thumb. He felt Vince lean into the touch.

'Didn't think I was gonna come that quick,' Vince giggled, eyes clocking Howard's cock standing tall and yearning for any form of attention. He reached down without hesitation.

'No need, little man, you're tired and we need to get you cleaned up, don’t want these getting infected,’ Howard said, ready to climb off from on top of him.

'C'mon, Howard, I'll get you off quick,' he whined, causing Howard's skin to tingle at the thought of Vince wanting to get him off so badly. Vince licked his lips, eyes flicking from Howard’s lustful eyes to his leaking cock.

How could he turn that down?

Vince’s hands could truly work magic, Howard had known it for some time now but it was always the first thing that came to his mind the second those slender fingers wrapped around his cock. His wrist started off slow before it began to build into fast rhythmic jerks, those innocent blue eyes never leaving Howard’s face.

‘So good,’ he whispered, head falling back in bliss. 

‘Yeah?’ Vince rasped, running his free hand up and down the thigh that straddled his waist. ‘Y’gonna come f’me? Please?’ he said breathlessly, clearly putting on an act, knowing how much Howard adored when Vince begged. 

‘K-keep going,’ Howard muttered, feeling himself closing in on his climax. ‘Oh, Vince.’

‘Come f’me, Howard. I want you t’come for me, I want your come,’ Vince spewed his filthy words, flicking his wrist to the left, causing Howard to jolt forward in surprise.

His orgasm rocked through his body, hot white pleasure seeping deep into his skin. Vince’s wrist never faltered as Howard rode out his high, his hips thrusting into his fist occasionally.

Howard struggled to catch his breath. ‘That was…’

That was genius!’ Vince said, grinning down at the red lines decorating his stomach. He looked like a maniac, Howard thought, but in the afterglow of his orgasm, he looked absolutely beautiful.


End file.
